Hello and thank you for joining me in this belated rachnotes blog post. The aim is once a month. I missed my own deadline!
Although the script was written in time the move to a new home hindered the final edit and send button being pressed to publish.
It sounds so grand doesnt it! Publish! I resonated with another writer when she said that writing has a long list of benefits and this does not have to be a book. It is a great way to process thoughts. Clarify faith focus. Mindfullness. A way of stetching out your thinking, often bouncing off from a talk heard or a book read, I digress there. We are now moved in to our new space and boxes mostly unpacked. Just today I found my jugs scissors and took over the shed with a creative burst!
In the midst of our pelargonium stars and bursting dahlia’s we are enjoying a period of beautifully warm summer sunshine in the UK.
It was during the month of June she considered the song sung in worship and its meaning. Faithfulness – constant, dependability. Faithfullness to me is that ongoing reliance on the sustaining presence of God inside my life no matter the crisis or circumstance. His very breath is there.
2 Timothy 2:13
The Passion Translation
But even if we are faithless, he will still be full of faith, for he never wavers in his faithfulness to us.
Walking around these walls
I thought by now they’d fall
But You have never failed me yet
Waiting for change to come
Knowing the battle’s won
For You have never failed me yet
Your promise still stands
Great is Your faithfulness, faithfulness
I’m still in Your hands
This is my confidence, You’ve never failed me yet
Faithfulness, it came to me, is the Fathers responsibility. Mine is to trust in Him who offers it freely. To me it offers a reliable presence. A profound care that covers me.
This realisation is one I’m mulling over.
I consider how I sing and know these words. Yet I don’t. Not fully grasping this dynamic truth. His faithfulness.
I love singing the lyrics above. How true, perhaps my confidence has been misplaced at times. Looking at another’s perspective or story. Unforced rhythms of grace has taught me that this is my story. Her slow and wild. The truth of it is like a discovery of the pearl. Searching. Uncovering it’s fragrance, it’s wonder. It’s divine working, that light that keeps shining brighter. It’s gonna get bright.
Hope colours the horizon.
Recently I’ve been understanding the power of lies.
The ones I subtly agree with. An oversight that can leave me with conversations inside my head that speak against the truths of faithfulness that the trinity of the godhead would have me believe.
It’s recognition is the first step into the way of truth.
Do you believe lies? Small whisper notes that instead of bringing life they bring diminished living.
When truth is revealed the lies I think about myself and ultimately God, bring a greater perspective of kingdom living into ones life.
For years I have read the Word in season and out. Yet missed the subtlety of living life under a judging rule, rather than of freedom.
It’s a journey.
Wrapped inside the unfolding are two things. Courage and faithfulness. Our courage to wait. His faithfulness that covers all things. Why fret we ask, when the words are framed for us in eternity. The courage is covered by His grace.
Today I wrote these words in my journal
As midway in the year of learning about slowly embracing discipline of paying attention. My tendency is to hurry. To slow hurts. Busy covers the needs inside me.
Slow brings me to a place of recognition.
To understand my own uniqueness.
To stand alone and not be frightened.
To be okay with not being a copy of someone else.
To be the person God created. His design.
Not to be favoured.
Not being compared.
Being loved for who I am.
As her slow and wild forms ripples of learning, of growing and risking writing her journey. She embraces its process knowing it is good. Inside it God is faithful.
Furthermore in my pencilled journey the words were scribbled
Be present, not fearful
Slow in order to listen
Slow enough to observe
Slow to pay attention to her own soul stuff
Slow to consider the next moment
Slow to remember you are seen by the triune God
There is this battle inside her. When feelings feel uncomfortable there is the fight to correct, erase, edit and even give up. The emotion feels so big it needs fixing now. In time the issues are sorted and settle themselves into a peaceful way forward. The inner struggle is considered as temporary although at the time there is a a deep pit to climb up from. Slowing and patiently trusting is not her art. This is the journey she takes. The remembering, the deep learning of One whose faithfulness never fails. She reads the quotes about continuum. She valued this. Even when the gut twists with unresolved outcome. In the end she knows the Holy Spirit over her and through her. In the overwhelming power of fixing the thing that’s being wrestled with she needs to slow. Pay attention. Let go. Quit trying to be the fixer and trust the Lord to do this thing, this part, this way of life. Trust completely in the faithfulness of her Father so hold everything beautifully.
She reads in Romans 8
For the Holy Spirit makes God’s fatherhood real to us as he whispers into our innermost being, “You are God’s beloved child .
She know her trust is a slow work and faith will grow as she leans right in. Daily.
The slow work of pausing to listen.
Paying attention to what matters.
Knowing You have never failed me yet.
Love Rach x